You need rules. Real rules. The kind that make people uncomfortable. The kind that separate the wheat from the chaff and leave the chaff standing outside in the cold wondering what the hell just happened.
Let me tell you about a rule that changes everything for me…
Once you’re in, if you leave, you can’t come back. Period. End of story. No second chances unless the universe literally catches fire and even then we’ll consider it on a case by case basis.
Sounds harsh? Good. It’s supposed to.
Here’s what happens when you implement this kind of boundary.
Suddenly your tribe becomes precious. Suddenly being part of your world means something. Suddenly people pay attention instead of treating you like background noise they can tune out whenever something shinier comes along.
I learned this from my pal Ben. 4 shiny quarters Vs 100 sticky pennies…
Think about it. Right now, your customers know they can leave and come crawling back whenever they want. They can ignore your emails for months, buy from your competitors, treat you like their backup plan…
It’s like the “You up?” booty call.
I’m not about being a booty call…
But when people know that walking away means walking away forever? Everything changes. They engage differently. They value what you’re offering differently. They show up differently.
Scarcity creates value. And permanence creates commitment.
The beautiful part? This rule filters out the wrong people automatically. The tire kickers, the bargain hunters, the people who were never going to be good customers anyway…
…they self select out.
They hear “no second chances” and run for the hills.
Let them run.
The people who stay? The people who think “holy shit, this person has standards”? Those are your people. Those are the customers who pay attention, follow directions, and don’t waste your time with endless questions they could have answered by reading what you already sent them.
I mean it can be part of your philosophy or rules of business.
I’m more of a creating a culture kind of person. A tribe. A place where membership actually means something because not everyone gets to be here.
Your email list becomes exclusive. Your products become sought after. Your attention becomes valuable.
And yes, you’ll lose people. Some will leave just to test if you really mean it. When you don’t chase them, when you don’t beg them to come back, when you let them discover what it feels like to be on the outside looking in. Some will realise what they gave up.
Too bad. They made their choice.
What most people don’t understand is the customers you lose by having standards weren’t really customers anyway.
They were tourists. And tourists don’t build businesses. Committed tribe members do.
Set your rules. Enforce them consistently. Let people know that being part of your world is a privilege, not a right.
A dictatorship if you must…
And watch what happens when you stop chasing people who don’t want to be caught.
Your tribe will tighten. Your engagement will skyrocket. Your revenue will come from people who actually give a damn.
Nothing makes people want something more than knowing they might not be able to have it.
Be exclusive. Be unavailable. Be the place people fight to get into and not the place they take for granted.
This is probably one of the most important things I learnt from my boy Ben Settle
I just do what smarter people tell me to do and hey, so far it’s been working pretty damn well…
Stephen Walker.